I wanted more, he wanted less...

I wanted a nice date. He wanted something, well, less.

There I was at this bar in Smallville, having such a blast on the dance floor. I'm sure the pitcher of margarita downed earlier with my friend and the second bottle of San Mig Light in my hand had something to do with it. There I was just dancing to the thumping of the DJ, unmindful of the people around me.. Yeah, I did a crowd scan and when I noticed that most of the crowd were kiddies, I went back to just enjoying the good music.

Then this guy and his guy friend were dancing right next to me. I wasn't sure if they were with other people. I wasn't sure if he played for the team. I'm sure his friend does. Hehe! So I was just doing my thing and I would look at him once in a while.

Two, three songs later, I found myself daring enough to do something I don’t usually do - I held his hand. No, San Mig Light held the guy's hand. I was merely just an instrument of that alcohol to do it's thing. He held my hand back. And then I would let go, just to make sure that he knew what was happening.

A couple of hand grazes more and introductions were made. Not even the deafening club music stopped us from trying to hear each other. In fact, the loud music gave us reason to get closer and whisper to each other's ears. I found out that he's in town for vacation. That he's from Cebu. That his name was ****, but let's call him Doc. That he was based in Manila (and this was my favorite)!!!

I bought Doc a beer, and we spent the next hour or so just dancing. His friend left and just messaged that he went ahead already. I couldn't care less. Eeep! I knew the club catered to a "mixed" crowd, so I didn't hesitate to put my hands around his waist. Doc didn't think twice when he put his arms around my neck. Man, I couldn't believe what was happening was happening. There amidst that packed crowd, Doc and I danced like we've known each other for years. I made Doc turn around so that he can lean on me, while I wrapped my arms around his trunk. Doc rested his head on my chest. Gawd, it was really happening.

A couple of times he left me to say he was going to the men's, and I was half-expecting him not to return, but we still found each other and carried on with things.

I was sure Doc had way too many SMLs already, but I'm sure he was still aware of what was happening. Had I been an a-hole, I would have taken advantage of the situation. I would have kissed him on the lips. I would have placed my hands on places where it shouldn't be. I would have been an ultimate jackass.

But I'm not. What do I do instead? I get him bottled water and make him drin k it so it could hopefully help sober him up. I held him in my arms, let him rest his head on my shoulder. I comb through his hair with my hands, hoping that it would give some soothing relief. I kept on telling him that we should leave already so that he wouldn't miss his flight.

This may be hard to believe, but I was ready to help him pack his bag and accompany him to the airport just to make sure he didn't miss his really, really early flight. I thought to myself that since I've practically just little sleep time, I might as well stay awake for the remaining hours. And for some reason, I knew I would feel bad if Doc missed his flight.

Three hours before his flight, we were at his room. I sat on the side of one bed waiting for the Doc to finish packing before wishing him a safe trip and putting him on a cab. What happened next was not what I had in mind.

When Doc finished packing, he turned off the TV and lay on the bed where I sat. He took off his shirt and unbuckled his belt. I ignored him, but I lay beside him and reminded him that it was time to go. How did Doc respond?

He pushed my head down, way down.

One would think it was perfect. For a twenty-year-old boy with raging hormones maybe.

I thought, "What?! This is just going to be a one-night stand. The past couple of hours is only going to lead to this."

You might probably say, "Well, what did you expect?" I dunno. I guess I thought we could have been the exception that night, but as it turns out, we weren't. It was just another random hookup.

I knew what I had to do, and surprisingly, I didn't find it very hard to do it. Yeah, stone me for being a prude at that moment, but I didn't have regrets. Before I left, I gave Doc a kiss on the cheek and said, "I thought you'd want something more."

And without thinking again, I left the half-asleep, half-naked guy and walked back to where I was headed.

The situation kind of reminded me of a scene from Broken Hearts Club, the queer fic every newbie should watch. LOL! That scene where Kevin and J. Crew Guy were about to go at it, and he changes his mind.

What's surprising though is that I seem to be okay. I'm not cool with it, but it didn't ruin the remainder of my stay in the city. Jani the tarot card reader mentioned that I needed to shatter some notions I had and I guess this was a start. Sayang lang because I thought it was more than what it was. Oh well. Moving on.